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His Effing Nibs

~ In which David Brittan writes a book

His Effing Nibs

Category Archives: Book progress

Join me at The Necessary magazine

29 Tuesday Sep 2020

Posted by davidbrittan in Book progress, Writers' tools

≈ 2 Comments

I’ve put the powdered wig in mothballs, traded the quill and ink for multimedia editing software, and immigrated to the 21st century. If you have even the slightest interest in music, fiction, poetry, painting, sculpture, dance, theater, film, or any other form of art, you should come to The Necessary, an arts magazine like no other. Once there, be sure to click the Follow button. See you in the present.

Wherefore the long silence?

23 Thursday Mar 2017

Posted by davidbrittan in Book progress

≈ 12 Comments

Woman Reading a Letter, 1775 by Pierre-Alexandre Wille

If you allow a blog to go dark, as I’ve done over the past year and a bit, people tend to assume the worst. My wife, Kathleen, has been flooded with expressions of sympathy: “Can I have his old Volvo?” “Did he leave anything in a size 38?” “Would he have minded if I asked you out?”

Imagine the puzzled look on people’s faces when she replies, “You’d better ask him. He’s standing right here!”

Yes, my friend, I am very much alive, and so is my book project. Sure, there are days when I think the book will kill me, but that’s probably true of any author who has to climb very tall trees to acquire the eagle quills he or she is using to write the manuscript.

Why did I stop posting? Because, much as I enjoy our time together, I discovered that I can either write a blog or write a book. If you haven’t heard from me in a while, that’s a good thing — it means the book is coming along. And when I do post, like today? Well, you should probably just pat me on the fanny and offer a few words of encouragement, such as “You get back in your cage RIGHT NOW, BUSTER! And don’t come out until you’ve produced a towering, swash-buckling thrill of a book whose fully realized characters leap off the page!”

But as long as I’m off my leash for a second, let me give you a quick update.

The project has morphed quite a bit. For one thing, it’s no longer a story collection. I set out to write short stories for the simple reason that I didn’t feel ready to write a novel. Then I got wise to the fact that you never feel ready to write a novel — any more than you feel ready to drink a big bottle of Pine-Sol. If you’re going to do it, you just have to do it. And so my story collection has become a novel (a comic novel, because of the kind of guy I am). The working title remains His Effing Nibs.

I’m sorry to say I had to fire my two main characters. Lord Timothy Dexter and Jonathan Plummer, real-life eighteenth-century figures who fascinated me, were too obscure to justify the amount of control they insisted on having over the plot. I replaced them with fictional characters who do as I tell them. And here is how their story is unfolding:

In a New England seaport in 1789, Samuel Poore, an itinerant wordsmith, applies for the job of Poet Laureate to the principled but unpopular Lord Benjamin Barley (aka His Effing Nibs). Samuel, much degraded by his years as an indentured servant, hopes the fancy title will launch him into polite society. But the job is not what it seems. His real assignment, he learns, is to teach reading and writing to runaway slaves — dozens of whom have found sanctuary on Barley’s estate. Samuel is torn between his longing for respectability and his students’ (and his employer’s) quest for justice. The resolution comes only after an abduction, a rescue attempt, and a guest appearance by a celebrity slaveholder.

I include, at no extra charge, subplots concerning animal rights, a tug-o-war over the future of America’s enslaved population, and the writing of a sex manual called The Pleasures of the Marital Bed by an author who is entirely lacking in firsthand knowledge.

Now well into the first draft, I’m glad I chose the novel over the short stories, and really glad I held off on the Pine-Sol. Thanks for checking in. The next time you hear from me, I just might have something to show you.

Why Timothy Dexter

04 Friday Sep 2015

Posted by davidbrittan in Book progress, Timothy Dexter

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The quote with which I kicked off this blog tells you all you need to know about why I chose to make Timothy Dexter the lead character of my planned stories and novels. It’s the opener to his little book, A Pickle for the Knowing Ones: Or, Plain Truths in a Homespun Dress, published in 1802, when Dexter was fifty-five. There is so much to explore in those few words: “Ime the first Lord in the younited States of A mericary, Now of Newburyport. It is the voise of the people and I cant Help it and so Let it goue.”

The first thing you notice is the inventive spelling. Some of it can be explained by a lack of schooling and a paucity of dictionaries. But a glorious mash-up like “the younited States of A mericary” — surely that belongs in a category by itself. Was the guy dyslexic? Did he have other “learning issues?” Did this hinder his quest for social acceptance? And what should we make of the missing punctuation marks (I threw a few in for readability)? Were they the spines on the pickle that Dexter was metaphorically ramming up his neighbors’ backsides? Answering those questions is a book in itself.

But dig deeper and the quote opens up a universe of paradox and pain. A lord. In the United States. The fledgling democracy has no use for a hereditary peerage, so Dexter’s title is bestowed by “the voise of the people.” He’s the first lord to be democratically elected! Not only that, but he “cant Help it.” The title has been foisted upon him by those who (I think) resent his rise from poor tradesman to wealthy merchant. The big house surrounded by statuary, the fancy carriage drawn by cream-colored horses, the expensive clothes — this was way too much upward mobility for a humble leather dresser.

The standard lore about Dexter says he “proclaimed” himself a lord, and did so out of vanity. But I say, poppycock. The Dexter in my stories — and I think the real Dexter — is a man of talent and imagination who goes along with the mock title of “lord” to show that he can take a joke. Just like Obama embracing the once-disparaging term “Obamacare,” or Volkswagen owning the term “bug,” or Target owning the “Tarzhay” label, Dexter “can’t help it, and so lets it go.” A little further on, he forgives the haters(and I’m transliterating): “No bones broken. All is well, all in love.”

As a writer, I am drawn to all of these tensions — between the man and his time, the man and his town, the man and his mythology. And of course the continuing struggle between the man and his native language. Somebody can have a hell of a lot of fun with this, and it might as well be me.

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Subjects discuss’d herein

  • Book progress (3)
  • Dexter's image (1)
  • Items of questionable veracity (2)
  • Jonathan Plummer (3)
  • Quotations (4)
  • Timothy Dexter (3)
  • Tools of the trade (2)
  • Writers' tools (1)

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